Monday, July 16, 2007

Who has time to blog? (aka Some thoughts about HP7)

The Darling Boy keeps poking at me to write. I want to post more; I really do. But blogging cuts into my reading time, and I do love my reading time. Anyway, don't expect me to be around next weekend at all. (Not that anyone expects me to be around on any kind of regular basis at this point.)

This weekend is Harry Potter weekend. Yes, at long last, the last book. What will befall our bespectacled hero? Will he live? Will he die? I suspect that certain segments of the internet will be quite deserted Saturday, as millions of readers tune out this world to enter the other. My Darling Boy has generously (and wisely) decided to abscond to the chess shop so that he won't disturb me. No telling which of us will be in greater emotional distress at the end of the day.

Personal predictions:

(Spoiling Books 1-6)

(Spoiler Space)

(No Book 7 spoilers here, I swear. I do intend to speculate some, and I don't know if I will hit the mark on any of them. Read at your own risk.)

(Non-Spoiler Spoiler Space)

(Sorry. People tend to get awfully sensitive about spoilers where I tend to lurk.)


So. Personal Predictions:

Harry lives. Harry has to live. Since Book 1, Chapter 1, Harry has been "The Boy Who Lived." To kill him now would make his survival in infancy and his death-defying Hogwarts career pointless. Harry doesn't die. It would render his entire 17-year existence pointless. Harry will be "The Man Who Survived". (I will it so.)

Ron, Hermione, and Ginny will probably live too. I can't quite articulate why. Rowling doesn't seem to mind killing popular and important characters, but I think this group of friends (and lovers, in the adolescent kind of way) will, like Buffy and the Scooby Gang at the end of Season 3 (Graduation Day Parts 1 & 2), survive the devastation, take a moment, and move on to the next stage in life. There's always a good fight waiting to be won.

Snape is toast. I actually think that Snape is one of the good guys. Lord knows he's not nice, kind, sweet, lovable. Like Sondheim says in Into the Woods, "Nice is different than good." Fact is Snape killed Dumbledore. Even if he did it under Dumbledore's orders, he can't take back that act. He can't return to the Order of the Phoenix (OotP); even if they understand, they won't forget, and they can't pretend that everything is normal. Snape might be able to hide out for a while with the Death Eaters, but as soon as he's ordered to kill Harry or anyone in the OotP, he will falter and be found out. I believe he will be killed, while saving Harry, by Voldemort himself. It sounds cliched, but I think it's the most probable outcome for Snape. On a side note, I don't believe the Lily/Snape 'ship that many internet fans seem to be sailing. I do think that Snape was in love with Lily, but I don't believe for a minute it was reciprocated. Snape will save Harry because Harry has Lily's hazel eyes. (Bonus cookie for anyone who can name that particular reference!)

I think Hagrid is also marked for death. I don't have a good reason, but it just seems right.

I think Mr. and Mrs. Weasley are safe thought. Harry can't lose his entire surrogate family. Percy, however, will die after seeing the error of his ways, apologizing profusely to his family for being a relentless boorish prat (the family, of course, forgives him in a shower of tears and hugs), and defending them all by flinging levitating cauldrons (regulation strength) at Peter Pettigrew (stupid family rat). Fred and George Weasley's various practicale jokes wreak havoc among the Death Eaters; it turns out Bellatrix has a uncontrolable sweet tooth that plays right into the Weasley twins' hands.

Neville is going to have gloriously heroic death. His parents would have been so proud.

The Malfoys survive, but find the family fortune was replaced by leprechaun gold and must now (shudder) work for a living. Malfoy will follow his favorite teacher's footsteps and become the most hated teacher at Hogwarts (except among the Slytherians).

McGonagall will hold down the Hogwarts fort until Harry is ready to assume the mantle of youngest Headmaster in Hogwarts history, but only after his glorious career as the greatest Quidditch Seeker known by the wizarding world.

So. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it. Until Saturday anyway.

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